So I deposited my check today, and afterward the little lady and I went to the pizza place. There weren't any other customers. And we're sitting there eating and the guy behind the counter says, "You guys want some slices, like in a box?"
I'm stunned. He can't mean...free pizza! He must be trying to sell us some. Our bewildered, hopeful faces make him stammer.
"I, I mean...we're getting ready to close in a while...and nobody really comes in this late, and uh...we're just gonna keep, like, a rack of slices and chuck the rest...so, if you guys wanted some...uh...I mean...."
The little lady breaks the silence. "Are you telling us you want to give us free pizza?"
"Yeah, yeah, do you guys want some?"
"Well hell yeah!"
So he fills up a box with varied slices, and I'm thinking "free lunch tomorrow!" But then he fills up another one, and then a third, smaller box. And we walk out with three slices of veggie lovers, two meat lovers, two chicken ranch, two barbecue chicken, half a cheese pizza, and half a pepperoni with mushrooms. Too sweet!
It's been a while since I posted, so I feel obligated to check in. I'm not doing anything special on this particular night, and so I have no excuse. Truth is, I do: there's stuff I meant to do tonight. But I'm not going to do it, and I've moved on. I'm doing this instead. But what to write about? The motivation has escaped me.
My eyes drift to the left and watch the hockey game. Florida has tied it up. Hooray.
I drift back and contemplate writing about politics. Kerry. Why Kerry? How was he underestimated for so long? But my heart's not in it, and away it goes.
Away again, I stare to my right this time, and follow the odd orbit of the second hand on my counter-clockwise clock. Tock, tick, tock, tick.
And back. I've tried two new brands of high-quality gin this week. Hollingsworth has a cucumber infusion, and claims to be the gin of "1 in 1000 gin drinkers." Truthfully, I'd guess it's an inflated claim. The other brand, Magellan's, is much better, easily one of the best gins I've had. It's also infused, but it made the safe choices of petals & irish root instead. But I don't feel like writing about that either.
And there's a pretty damn funny new Heineken commercial out, but there's no link from their site, and I don't really feel like going into detail about it.
Poker is best played with Playboy playing cards. And a clean desk gets messy much faster than a messy desk gets messier.
So no post today, guys. Sorry.
Why not gay marriage? Why the fuck not?
Don't get me wrong: the state absolutely should not tell any religion what to do on this issue. Human sacrifice, yes. Marriage, no. If {religion X} doesn't want to allow same-sex couples to get married, that's their deal. Not a state matter. So don't get me wrong here.
But if the state chooses to provide marriage for opposite-sex couples, how can it not provide those rights to same-sex couples? Civil Unions are a big step forward. But it's Plessy v. Ferguson, not Brown v. Board. Yeah, I know, baby steps and all that. But we're all hung up on this word: "marriage." Oh, gee, "marriage!" That's a social hangup of our time, and I understand the hold it has on some people, I really do. But we need to move beyond that hangup, and hangups like it, and eventually we will. That's not a guess; it's not a prediction: it's a guarantee, from me to you. Let's just skip the 10, 25, 50 years of interim conservative wrangling and accept it now. These people who say "oh, let's give them the same rights, but call it something else" are the same people who used to say "let's give the blacks a school system of approximately equal quality, but don't let them into OUR schools."
Giving gays and lesbians "civil unions," is a step forward, and I support it. I realize that at the same time some states are taking that step forward, Ohio is about to take a step backward. So please don't take this to be a disparagement of what progress we've made. But eventually, gays and lesbians will say "how come we're only good enough for 'civil unions?'" just as other minority groups have said "how come we're only good enough for 'separate but equal?'" And when they say that, they'll be right: they'll deserve better than that. But they deserve better than that right now. Why not just skip all the bullshit?
There's a debate on TV right now, dealing with whether states should be obligated to recognize the marriage laws of other states. They shouldn't: no state should have individualized marriage laws, or individualized laws on any civil rights. It should be a national law, 100%, right now. Think of the debate 200 years ago over whether the northern states should be obligated to return slaves that ran away from their masters in the south. That was the law of the land, and it had some support even among those who opposed slavery, because some of them felt the states' rights on that matter were of superior value to the embattled black man's. It was wrong, but we got past it. Today, it would seem like lunacy to propose that each state be allowed to pass its own slavery laws, and then debate whether other states should or should not be obligated to recognize those states' sovereign rights to declare slavery legal. Gay marriage will eventually seem as obviously correct as the abolition of slavery. States don't get to say murder is legal, or arson is legal, and they shouldn't get to say who deserves to get married and who doesn't. That's just logic, regardless of your feelings on homosexuality. It's the constitution. So fuck all that.
Yes, I have a strong opinion on this, but I'm perfectly willing to listen to anyone who's willing to try to explain why 10% of America's population should not be allowed the full rights of the other 90%.
Here's a site you absolutely need to see: MusicPlasma.com. Too damn awesome! I'd explain it, but it explains itself much better. Let's just say this is the best resource I know of for discovering new music that's likely to appeal to you.
Speaking of music that appeals to you, check out Seastar NT's music page! Download some crazy good shit! I recommend "OnoMo", "Yeah! Come On", "Timmy Crimson", and "Apple Tree." Pretty good stuff, imho...coming along!
That's it for tonight. Life plods along.
I haven't laughed this hard in a long time. Go check out BushRevealed.com!
Find out why all good Christians are refusing to vote for Bush! Discover his:
DON'T just sacrifice your Christian vote for the sake of conservative values! "God has not called us to a lesser of evil. He's called us to holiness!"
Check out the Forums! My recommendation? Are you people SERIOUS?? (It's not what you think: the guy's not amazed that they're so far to the right that they'd make a site like this. Oh no! He's aghast that they're willing to seriously suggest that they run the risk of voting against Bush and possibly going back to another President like the last guy, who only waved his bible when it served his purpose!)
Find out if YOU'RE... Good Enough to Enter Heaven!
Truly, a site worth exploring! And remember: "the neoconservatives in control of our administration now are actually disenchanted LIBERALS who are being called ultra-right-wing conservatists [sic]."
Streakers in restaurant* watch as their car, clothes stolen
*: Denny's. You're shocked, right?
A new study prompts Congress to pass legislation that outlaws a popular exercise: running!
...the sign at the bank said it's "negative zero."
Must we include the "-"?!
Ah, C-SPAN. How do I love thee?
So Bush is announcing a "temporary" work plan for illegal immigrants (the "Tell Us Who You Are, Then Pack Up This Cabbage and Get the Fuck Out" Act). What this entails is illegal immigrants paying a registration fee to declare their presence, then working temporarily at their job and then going home. If they fail to register, they're subjected to a $1500 fine if caught (which money, presumably, they'd be raising from working in the US illegally, or from theft or what have you). This from Scott McClellan, White House Press Secretary. I may have botched some of the details because it's hard to listen to Scott McClellan.
Well, as it turns out, some Americans like this plan and some don't. McClellan's session wrapped up at 2:15, and Bush is scheduled to speak at 2:45. What's an ad-free network to do? Why not get some people from the Cato Institute and the National Immigration Forum to answer calls from opinionated Americans! Perfect!
But there's a problem: the recent upswing in America's economy means even complete morons can afford phones, which effectively turns C-SPAN into a soapbox for Cletus to explain how this policy to allow immigrants in--just for a while, and then they have to leave, mind you--is actually a devious conspiracy arranged by Republicans, Democrats, and the Catholic Church. According to Cletus (name changed to protect the ignorant) the Republicans want to enact this plan so they can buy Mexican votes (this despite the fact that they're not citizens, won't have the right to vote, and must leave the country after their temporary job). The Democrats want this because Mexicans will all move into poor areas and suffer a lack of education, which will lead them to vote Democrat. And the Catholic Church wants this because they've become tired of crusading in the rest of the world, and have decided to just concentrate all their followers in one region: the US. This, says Cletus--on national TV, with no trace of irony or shame--is a deliberate conspiracy dreamed up by both major political parties and the Catholic Church to corrupt the White Race and disenfranchise the economy that the White Man has so taken so long to build up. Thanks for buying that phone, Cletus. I hope it was made by a White Guy.
But they're not all racist morons: some are just morons. A later dialogue with another caller included this exchange: "You guys all love this plan! You're just Bush butt-kissers!" "Do you have a specific question, sir?" "Yes! This is wrong! The majority of Americans don't want this!" It's ok, pal: statements are kind of like questions.
Ah, fun stuff. Thank you, C-SPAN! And I bet you thought Comedy Central had some funny shit! And now: the "President of the United States."
Yes, Bush's remarks included a mention of the terror attacks of 9-11. "Do you all remember 9-11? There were terror attacks on 9-11. Don't forget that. This immigration policy is anti-terror. If you don't like terror, you should support this immigration plan." That might not be a direct quote, but it's close. Does Johnny Cochran contract for the White House, or what? "Hey, mention terrorism again! People will forget if you don't mention it a FRIGGIN BILLION TIMES A DAY!!!"
And we've just been informed that the government will develop a quick and simple system for employers to search for American workers. That's just tossed in as an aside. Don't take notice of that! (It sounds pretty sketchy if you actually pay attention to it.)
All right, the blood pressure's going up, and involuntary violent twitches have made it hard to type. Time to stop the entry and change the channel.
Suit seeks to ban sales of popular video game.
Yes, it's Grand Theft Auto: Vice City! Haitian Civil Rights groups have filed suit against the game to ban its sale. The line "Kill All Haitians" has been deemed offensive, and offensive behavior has been outlawed since the Go Fuck Yourself, America Act of 1964.
I'm certainly not trying to offend them further (after all, if they'll sue a video game company for a whopping $15,000, they'd probably sue an individual for at least $20), but if you're REALLY afraid of people who are so obsessed with a video game that they would act on a line like "Kill All Haitians" in real life, wouldn't it be a bad idea to sue the makers of the game? Remember, the Internet facilitates fast communication. How long would a chatroom conversation like that take?
Online Vice City Support Group:"Hey, we can't play Vice City anymore! Oh, God...there's a gaping void where my soul once was! The anguish! The rage!! NOW what're we gonna do? Hey, whose fault is this anyway? And what would Tommy Vercetti do?"
Ah, but seriously, folks. Video games don't kill people, and nobody who wouldn't kill people anyway is suddenly going to decide to go on a killing spree because of a video game. Hey, Haitian Civil Rights Groups: doesn't Haiti itself have any problems that should be solved before we start worrying about the particular phrasing of Vercetti's missions?
PS: John Ashcroft--I'm just kidding; go ahead and ban the game. Ban Kwanzaa, too, and jazz and protests and pens with red ink, if you want. I was in your corner the whole time.